***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
