just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
