I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Randomize