let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
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