Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Randomize
