So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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