Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize