Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize
