Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize
