He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
