dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
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