Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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