so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
