Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
ttyl tear gas
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
That accounts for only three of the penises
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
