When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Randomize
