he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
And my parents said I crawled through the house
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
