I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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