carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
How naked do you want me to be?
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
