Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
After last night, I could never be a politician.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I'm way too hungover for life right now
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Randomize
