I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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