No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize
