Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Dicks are not precious.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize