HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
My bed smells like the plague
Randomize
