in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
love makes seman taste better
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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