I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Randomize
