Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
