i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
