I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
3 2 1 whiskey
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
