Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Randomize
