You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Randomize
