so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
