I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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