Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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