Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
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