How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
