I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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