there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
