If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Randomize
