Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
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