is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
Is it because I queefed?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
