ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
cat food counts as protein by the way
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Randomize
