Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
found the other keg... it's in the tree
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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