I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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