okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
