Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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