it wasn't lemon gatorade
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
