I've blown a few things in my day
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
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