she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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