He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
