I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize