Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Randomize
