omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I'm getting married
To pizza
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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